Have you ever thought something should really change, but doubted you could do it?

Well Guan Wei came to share how he made a change in 3 Awesome ways — helping to found the Orchestra of the Music Makers, setting up Conjunct Consulting’s NUS chapter, and doing official sports and music photography.

Before that Awesomeness totally intimidates you, never fear — here’s what kept him going! (Engineers out there will delight that they come in pithy engineering terms! For the not… don’t worry we had no idea either.)

Don’t be useless!

1. 2nd Law of Thermodynamics: Guan Wei gave us a Physics refresher to explain that it’s all about entropy — everything tends to falls apart. If you don’t keep pumping energy into an Awesome project you really care about, it’s going to take its natural course towards chaos.

2. Path Dependency: An honest piece of advice was pulled out of Chaos Theory — that where you are now is influenced by past circumstances. OMM arose through his network of musicians, and his involvement in Conjunct, from a serendipitous encounter with an old friend. Take note of what you can leverage!

3. Go and Be Useful: No Physics needed in this truism — what has always driven Guan Wei is using what skills we have to be as useful as possible to the world around us. And to juggle all our responsibilities, it’s a matter of not just deciding to be useful, but where you can be the most useful.

4. Pursue Excellence, Not Success: Don’t chase something Awesome looking for successes along the way! Instead concentrate on just pursuing excellence — doing the best job you can of what you’re doing. Successes just happen to be a side effect of that, and will come when they will.

All of us went on to discuss the problems we’d seen and had tried to solve, and what was fulfilling about it; and the problems we’d seen but hadn’t tried to solve, for which we traded quick tips on how to approach them!

Our brand new gorgeous venue really got the ideas flowing, and so did the yummy tidbits. A billion thank yous to DBS for generously hosting us!

Gorging ourselves on tartlets and ideas

In other news, AA TURNED ONE last weekend too! Back on June 2 2012, we had our inaugural gathering among friends who wanted to keep each other going on our amazing ideas. We had sensed our passions starting to peter out, and AA became a way to keep us conscious about fanning the flames before they died out all together.

6 months into it we got official and turned a nice shade of powder blue, and here we stand ever ever-enthusiastic to BE the change that empowers the people around us to be their best selves, and live the lives we’ve always imagined. Thanks for taking the journey with us!!

<3,
Carol

Hey guys, guess who’s back with an update on last week’s AA? Me. Obviously. If you didn’t make it, here’s what you missed:

Mary Kan, who started Singapore’s women’s water polo team (which won Gold in the 2011 SEA Games) came to chat with us. She’s this amazingly fiery, driven, intelligent character, hidden in a graceful and diminutive (if scary fit) body.

Mary, intimidating us with her passion. And demure poise.

Mary took us through the process it took to build the team up, from just a couple of competitive swimmers who were sometimes allowed to play water polo during their “free time”, to their current strength (they now have so many players they jokingly complain about all the time spent on the bench). This meant scraping together resources, and doing a lot of pride-swallowing (which is like sword-swallowing, only more painful) and asking for help, competing (and losing) against far better teams from other countries and coming out the other side stronger and better, and no less determined.

Here’s what I learned from her:

1. Always look for the next opportunity.

2. Don’t be afraid to rely on people. This means family, friends, coworkers, even people on the opposing side, who can be happy to extend their help.

3. Take advantage of all circumstances. This includes adversity.

4. This one is important: There will be sacrifices. Promotions, time with family, favourite pasttimes/food/people. What are you willing to give up for your dream?

We also played an awesome special game. This involved us pairing up for some… awkward soul searching?

Pictured: Awesome souls.

The point of the game was to help us all identify some of our behaviours that keep us from chasing our Awesome goals. But since you weren’t there, and I can’t rig up the game for you long distance, let me tell you a bit of a long story instead, to approximate the concept. So here goes:

There is this trap that I seem to keep falling into. Here’s what happens: I have a goal, e.g., getting a job. This goal is important to me; it’s something that will have an impact on the rest of my life. I put in the effort, do my research, talk to people, write up applications etc. So it all starts moving nicely along. People link me up with people. Options start to open. Things are looking up…

And I panic. The minute one or two job offers come in, I drop everything I’m doing, and I take the first offer that comes. Sometimes I hold out until the second one. I rely more on serendipity than strategy. Because I hate making decisions, I flail for the fastest solution.

So let’s pause there and analyse my crappy behaviour. I have a goal, but I quit chasing it, not because I stop being motivated, but because I just feel terrible about having to make an uncomfortable decision. As it turns out, people in uncomfortable situations tend to react in unproductive ways. Here are some typical reactions (take a look through and ask yourself if you lean on any of these methods):

1. Analysis Paralysis. The matter is too complex. You refuse to make a decision and just keep putting it off.

2. The Waiting Game. You sit tight and hope that something jumps out and grabs you, forcing you into one option.

3. The U-turn. You know exactly what you want, but that option suddenly becomes problematic or unavailable. You stop pursuing it immediately, not even considering a different approach, and snatch whatever comes by next.

4. The Panic Attack. See my personal example above. Indiscriminate acceptance of whatever comes first, without considering if it’s something you actually want.

5. The Panic Attack Prime. Variant of the Panic Attack. You take whatever comes first, fully aware that it’s not really what you want, but afraid that what you want will never come along and then it’ll be too late to go back to this currently available, albeit inferior, option.

6. The Thud Effect. You’ve actually done it, successfully avoiding all of the traps above! You’ve pursued exactly what you want whole-heartedly, without distractions… Only to be rejected. You call yourself a failure and never try for anything you want ever again.

Do any of these sound familiar to you? Is there something you can do to prevent this from happening again? What would you do differently? Hopefully the next time you have some choices to make, you keep your eye on the ball, and keep chasing the dreams you started out with.

Think about it, and I’ll see you next time! We’ve got the founder of the Orchestra of the Music Makers coming. He’s an inspiring guy – saw the need for a group to let young working adults make some music when they were out of school, and just… started one. Wow. I’m excited to meet him, and hope you guys will make it down too!

- Lynette

Hello, it’s me again, your friendly neighbourhood Awesomer. (Awesomite?) Have you been wondering how to test drive your Awesome, without shelling out tonnes of cash, or hours of wasted effort? What a coincidence, so have we! Which is why, for the latest session of AA, we invited Shaun from Syinc to come guide us through the basics of Prototyping.

Shaun’s an incredibly energetic guy. If he were a girl, I’d call him bubbly. But since he’s not, I’m going to use the word “dynamic”. And manly.

Fellow Awesomian and Facilitator Tim Quek describes him as “determined”. As in, determined to hammer out and refine his model of his Awesome goal, whatever that may be, by being willing to listen to and solicit honest feedback… and then to chuck away the useless (“Oh honey, that’s totally a perfect idea in every single way. You’re so good at this.”) or discouraging (“You should just drop everything right now and stop. Just stop.”) ones, and focus on incorporating the constructive criticisms.

Here’s Shaun’s magic formula for Prototyping:

Step 1. Get started. No, seriously, quit procrastinating and waiting for the perfect moment. Begin with something simple, something easy, just begin.

Step 2. Sketch. Or powerpoint. Or diagramify. Whatever works for you, just do a quick and dirty mock-up. This is your first prototype.

Step 3. Find someone. To work with, or to work for. This (to me, at least) above all, keeps you motivated and focused, instead of day dreaming on a lawn chair and snacking on chips.

Step 4. Get real feedback. See above, on being willing to chase down and listen to honest feedback. Take your prototype, and put it in people’s faces.

Step 5. Build a more robust prototype. When people have given you their criticism, (including, “What the heck, get that out of my face, nutjob.”) think about it, use what makes sense, adapt your prototype, test it again. You can put more effort into each successive prototype, because you’re getting closer, and will know more about what it should look like in the end.

Step 6. Keep track of what works, and what doesn’t. This is surprisingly easy to forget – stuff that didn’t work in your first version may pop up again in the fourth, because you’ve stopped paying attention to it.

Step 7. Keep trying, until you find enough things that work. Rinse and repeat, until happy.

A quick note on that “until happy” it. Shaun is of the firm belief that it is the process of prototyping, of refining your ideas until they become tangible, that makes you happy. In his words, “Sooner or later, the journey becomes the reward.”

I don’t know if you find that intuitive, but we tried our hands at prototyping right there in our AA session, and here’s the proof positive:

A group of happy Awesomese prototyping away.

That’s all for now guys, and hope to see you at our next session on May 5th!

- Lynette

Hey folks, I’m back! I’ve got an update for you on last week’s AA session, and I have to say, if you missed it, I feel sorry for you… because we had such a blast!

As evidenced herein.

But never mind, there’s always next time (keep an eye out here, on our facebook page, or join the A-list for an update), and to tide you guys over ’til then, here’s a quick recap:

1) Valerie from Project Hello Stranger dropped by to… say Hello. And! she gave us a great run-through of PHS’s (can I call it PHS?) ethos – which in her words is “to draw Singaporeans out of themselves”. What a beautiful thought, that all of us curmudgeonly citizens are actually just waiting for an excuse to connect with each other. I’m just as cynical as the next guy, but after hearing her success stories, I’m pretty inspired. I even smiled and waved at a crusty old uncle out for his evening walk around my neighbourhood as I passed him on my way home from AA. (Judging from his expression, though, I may need to work on my technique.)

Smiling and waving: harder than you might think.

Valerie is an inspirational force in and of herself; when you hear her speaking of her projects, and how the energy from the community is what keeps her going, her enthusiasm is totally infectious. She’s personally engaged, and engaging… She genuinely believes in what she’s doing. How many of us can say that?

2) Since the topic of the day was collaboration, everyone got a chance to sit down and do some thinking (and talking, of course) about the road bumps they’ve been running into while chasing Awesome, and to figure out

• What they need to get over those bumps and,
• Who they need to help them with that, whether it’s people they need to learn from, work with, or just to kick their butts and get them moving.

To paraphrase what a favourite professor of mine used to say, if you get stuck, you can’t just sit at your table and try to think harder. Sometimes you need to change what you’re doing, and if that means looking to other people for help or motivation, so be it.

3) Speaking of motivational figures, check out what our very own Vijay brought to show off at AA:

He’s got his Awesome hat on. Invisible, and Awesome.

4) And finally, I took advantage of my role as King Facilitator to make people do ridiculous things for my express entertainment, then called it “bonding”.

That’s me in black, “facilitating”.

It must’ve worked though, because check out these guys, who couldn’t bear the thought of going their separate ways after AA ended, having dinner together:

I feel like a proud mama.

That’s all for now! See you crazy awesome folk next time.

- Lynette

Hey guys, it’s been a week since our last AA session – hope you’re looking forward to the next one (check back either here on our facebook page to find out when!)

In the meantime, here’s a recap of what happened at AA last Saturday on the Big Blue Bus:

1) Hosea Lai, deputy director of SG Cares, let us have a thoroughly enjoyable chat with him on his views on Awesome.

Hosea has spread so much Awesome around himself (he started the Singapore and Sichuan offices of Habitat for Humanity, and also had some great stories of his work in Thailand and Myanmar).

His Awesome is bringing out Awesome in others, and this can come in many forms, whether it’s love for family, bravery amidst hardship, or joy despite scarcity. So remember guys, it is the desire to be Awesome that is Awesome, and you don’t need to be a hero or an expert – apply the skills that you already have, and pull Awesome out of the circumstances you are in, out of the people around you.

2) We updated each other on the states of our Awesome (doin’ good, guys!). We also took some time to think about our motivations for our current jobs, and how to keep them meaningful and fulfilling. (If you’d like to try this out by yourself at home, a good start would be to answer these questions: what made you apply for your current job? what can you do differently? how can you map your talents and skills to your projects or responsibilities?)

3) We also had a bit of silly fun: making pipe-cleaner and plasticine representations of our Awesome. Vijay’s minimalist approach was a crowd favourite… Thanks to all for coming, and hope to see you next time!

- Lynette

Hey Awesomefolk, thanks for joining us this past Sunday, for our especially epicurean episode of AA at Loola’s at the Esplanade!

We at AA HQ are such huge fans of Lyn Lee, for

a) Letting us totally mob the space in her restaurant,

b) Doing all she has done with her life, and then sitting down with us to really open up in an incredibly level-headed, down-to-earth, and for that reason twice-as-inspiring speech to let us know about it (more on that later),

and c) because chocolate.

Chocolaaaaate.

But back to Lyn’s story. For those who don’t know, Lyn is an ex-lawyer who started a chocolate cake shop that gradually expanded to a successful (and international!) franchise (and three restaurants). What we find particularly amazing is that she didn’t diversify to the restaurant business out of simple expansionism: it’s harder, there are more obstacles, and it doesn’t actually make more money. She did it because she wanted to give her employees the opportunity to learn, grow, and innovate. That’s the kind of Awesome that she is. Those of us who met with her on Sunday were fortunate enough to have her take her many years of awesome, and distill it for us into these three points:

1) Learn to work with people. Everyone has different skills/talents (e.g. math, or business sense, or having brilliant ideas like bringing cake to the masses…) and you’re going to need a team for every big endeavor. Don’t bother trying to find a “dream team” of people you loooove. Get the people you need. And then learn to love them… or at least to click with them.

2) Do your prep, take it step by step. (Full disclosure, that horrible rhyme is mine, not hers.) Lyn really doesn’t believe that Awesome comes from simply dropping what you’ve got to chase your dreams. Her story may sound a bit like that: she was a lawyer (for like a year), decided it wasn’t for her (something about not liking Ferragamos, which are apparently compulsory apparel in the courts), chose to start Awfully Chocolate (because, chocolate), and BAM! Awesome. Actually, no. If you’re in it because it sounds glamorous and romantic, don’t bother. Lyn started from the ground up: conceptualising with her team before taking that first step. You have to ask yourself: what are the first steps? How much will it cost? What am I willing to sacrifice, and what not? Don’t quit your day job before you’ve got the full picture. Lyn and her team never spent money that they didn’t have. Awfully Chocolate started small, from just one product from a little shop in Joo Chiat (that didn’t even have a cake chiller), to the delicious, audacious enterprise it is today, step by step.

3) It’s hard work. According to Lyn, most times Awesome comes from people who did things, not because they had a dream, but because they had no choice but to succeed. This means that you don’t chase your Awesome because it sounds like fun, but because you don’t see a viable alternative. Don’t quit your job because you find it too difficult, because, hey, all jobs are difficult. Lyn gave us something to chew on: It was actually easier for her to finish her law degree, than to pluck up the guts and determination (like some of her friends did) to quit and start from scratch on something new. Whatever your reason is – be it a commitment to supporting your family, passion for a particular field, or talent – find it, because it’s going to have to sustain you through a lot of rough patches.

I could go on and on about Lyn and her Awesome, but this is already a long post. For those who didn’t make it, sorry you missed out on this amazing opportunity to meet with Lyn. There is something we did during our sessions that you can tackle at home, though. We at AA believe that Awesome lies at the intersection of an individual’s strengths, values, and passions, like so:

Take 5 minutes to write down your own strengths, values, and passions (one or two of each), and brainstorm what your Awesome may be.

See you next time! We’re just gonna be here devouring cake from now till then.

- Lynette